Main Scripture Reference - Matthew 5:23-26
Other Scripture References: Matthew 7:1-2; Matthew 6:14-15; Romans 5:8; Matthew 5:9; Ephesians 4:32

INTRO–‘This is really about That’Read Matthew 5:23-26

Holidays, like mother’s day, are really appreciated by most people because it is a time to honor and celebrate relationships. But holidays can also be painful for the same reason, relationships. What Jesus really wanted everyone to understand in the ‘Sermon on the Mount’ is that everything is about relationships. And in this particular section he clearly states that making things right with people must precede your worship of God, because God wants the offering of your olive branch before he will accept the offering of your tithe. The problem is forgiveness is hard! Once offended, most people desire some sort of justice or feel entitled to some kind of recompense from the offender. However, God’s perspective is bigger than being right, it’s about being redemptive. You can’t be right with God until you are right with people.

• Which holiday is your family favorite? Do your holidays usually celebrate relationships or cause more pain than joy?


• Describe how your relationship with God, good and/or bad, has affected your relationships with significant others. How are your current family relationships affecting your relationship with God?


• What is the hardest thing about forgiving people who hurt you? Are you holding on to any offense right now hoping for some kind of admission of guilt, regret, or justice?

UN-FORGIVENESS–‘The Consequences’Re-read Matthew 5:25-26 & Matthew 7:1-2

If you do hold onto un-forgiveness there are major consequences the first being your own imprisonment to the past. You will never be able to move forward in life if you are chained to actions of another person, and holding on to that pain or hurt will continually keep you from being the person God has called you to be. The second consequence of un-forgiveness is that by doing so you set the standard for your own eternal judgment. Jesus is fairly clear that your forgiveness by God rests upon your own willingness to forgive others who have done far less to you than you have in offending and rebelling against God. Read Matthew 6:14-15

• Describe a time that un-forgiveness really kept you chained to the past. How did that affect your walk with Jesus?


• What personal consequences have you experienced because of lack of forgiveness on your part? What about the lack of forgiveness from others you’ve hurt?


• Do you believe with out a doubt that God truly has forgiven you of all your wrong actions and sin? What keeps you from totally believing it?

FORGIVENESS–‘Proactive Grace’Read Romans 5:8; Matthew 5:9; & Ephesians 4:32

To live out this crucial command of forgiveness you must understand that it is not about whose right and whose wrong, but about being God’s agent of reconciliation. In Matthew 5:25, the word for ‘settle’ literally means to let go, send away, pardon, and/or forgive. Since God whom you have offended and sinned against has settled your debt by the blood of Jesus Christ, you are to forgive others, even if they don’t deserve it, out of an act of love for Christ and obedience to God. Being proactive means taking that first step in offering grace to those who’ve hurt you, starting the healing of reconciliation; because life is all about relationships.

• Have you ever forgiven someone even though they did not apologize or even ask for it? What happened?


• Can you identify an area of un-forgiveness in your life that needs to be resolved? What first pro-active move will you commit to make in order to begin resolving it?


• What one broken relationship will you commit to begin healing by the process of proactive forgiveness?