Main Scripture Reference - Matthew 19:4-5
Other Scripture References: Matthew 6:33; Isaiah 61:3

THE PROBLEM–“No Commitment’,

What is astonishing is that approximately 50% of all marriages in the United States end in divorce but also that Christian marriages suffer at the same basic percentage. As one researcher said, “there no longer seems to be much of a stigma attached to divorce.” There are many causes of divorce but the most pressing question for Jesus followers to answer is why does it seem so hard to stay married and even more to stay committed to one person for life? Jesus calls you to begin thinking in a different way.

• Are you surprised by the high divorce rate of this country? Why or why not


• Why does it seem so hard to stay married in our culture? What do you think are the main one or two reasons people get divorced?

STEP 1–“Own Your Stuff”Read Matthew 19:4-

The good news is that God wants everyone to live committed lives in relationship whether in your married relationship or with intimate friends and family. Marriage between a man and a woman is God’s original design for intimacy but also designed so that the couple could experience God on a deeper level than being alone. The first tool is to realize that you and others are a work in progress. No one is perfect and no relationship is perfect, but the key is to own your own junk and allow God to bring healing in you so that your stuff won’t stop your marriage from working. You are to be concerned about seeking God and God’s kingdom in your life and watch as the changes in you make great changes in your relationships.

• What is one ‘work in progress’ item you are currently working to fix in your life or character? Are you allowing God to work to change yourself for the better? How?


• Do you typically bring outside stress or anxiety to your relationships or marriage? How can you begin to eliminate that from your relationships?

STEP 2–“Communicate”Read Matthew 6:33

The second tool you have in remaining fully committed is communication. Relationships naturally drift apart and without working hard to continually come together you will find yourself moving from an intimate relationship to a casual relationship. That is when problems arise and issues that could easily be worked through become barriers that aren’t easily fixed. You must learn to communicate everything with your spouse including your own stuff that needs work as well as the things God wants to work out in you together.

• Since relationships naturally drift apart, how are you intentionally working to move together as a couple?


• How do you best communicate with others? What do you need to improve?

STEP 3–“Celebrate”Read Isaiah 61:3

Finally you must commit to God both your marriage and all your relationships and celebrate them as gifts from God. When you commit your relationships to God, the one who designed relationships, you are committing to success. And when you celebrate the gift of another person in your life you honor God who created them and you.

• Do you ever seek God together with your spouse, children, or closest loved ones? If so what do you do and if not why?


• Do you celebrate your marriage or vital relationships on a daily, weekly and or yearly level? What do you do?


• do you need to do in order to make your most intimate relationships stronger?